Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
