White coat. Heels.
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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