2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Randomize
