do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
