Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
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