I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
