What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I just had sex on a roof
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
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