Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize
