OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
