no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
