Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
