i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Randomize
