I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
