So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
