Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Barsexuality is the new black.
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Randomize
