"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
