Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
its not stalking. its research.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
