Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
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