i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
