Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
