Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
