hotel room ftw
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I have tasted many bathrooms
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
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