white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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