Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
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