I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
