If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Randomize
