I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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