why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
