Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
As shirtless as possible
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
