Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
