Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
this boner is exhausting
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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