my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Randomize
