it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
