It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Randomize
