i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
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