oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
