consequently i now know what mace tastes like
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
