On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
