have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
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