he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
