Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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