oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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