If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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