return my video game
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Randomize
