Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
