New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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