Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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