wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Randomize
