Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
