drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
NoShamevember. You game?
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
